Ghetto Fights 3: DVD Review
If you haven’t read my previous DVD review on QUEEN OF THE HOOD:2, you can check it HERE!
I work in east downtown L.A., it’s grimy as fuck. About once a week—
I shit you not— there’s a one-armed Mexican dude with a long ponytail who comes by selling bootleg DVDs out of a soft, square-shaped, over-the-shoulder food cooling bag.
Most of his DVD’s are weird Spanish cartoons or movies you don’t know or want. Lots of horror films and then the usual topical blockbuster.
I go for the blockbusters- especially the ones that may NOT be worth the $12 L.A. movie ticket price. Bootlegs are $5 each or 5 for $20. OH did I mention the one-armed man has a small pocket on the front of the cooler filled with BOOTLEG PORNO? He does. I dare you to ask. He even had some weird pregnant porn and hairy bush shit. So fuckin creepy and weird!
Well the one-armed Mexican had nothing for me, but Raymond, the security guard at my office (who also doubles as a UFC fight announcer) let me borrow a film:
GHETTO FIGHTS: 3
This was hilarious- cuz RAYMOND the security guard, loaned me the DVD pictured above with no case, no nothing, just handed me a scratched up disc. I’ve never seen the box- so I downloaded this pic online:
GHETTO FIGHTS 3 is everything the title says. It’s terribly terrific. Some of the video appears to be shot from cell phone cameras, some of the environments include multiple fights at once and the camera man clearly seems confused and torn on WHO to film. Unlike Queen of the Hood: 2, these fights are not staged. It’s a collection of footage from people in the right place at the right time!
Here’s Some screen shots I took of the tv.
One of the fights in the beginning takes place INSIDE a bodega, hilarious!
Lots of the usual woman fighting woman (slap boxing)… Mostly black on black violence…. Although a couple highlights include; what appears to be a 10 year old getting in a free head-stomp to a dude who got whooped.
This guy had a very bizarre defense strategy. After getting kicked in the face about 126 times, he started doing this thing where he was grabbing on to the leg kicking him. Since about 3 dudes were all kicking him, he jumped from leg to leg, gripping for dear life. I’m not sure if this was his idea of preventing further face kicks or the dude was some queer-bait with a foot fetish. Only the Lord knows!
There is a great scene outside a housing project where after this OBESE woman gets her shirt ripped off— another lady carrying what looks like a 6 months old baby starts swinging on bitches- all WHILE holding a baby like a football! Hahahah Mom of the year!!!
Alot of bitch-fights, slapping, schoolyard kids, and drunkards- but this scene was fucked up. A couple heavy-weights got into it… This big dude got the shit beat out him, and then his head stomped (typical for these films) but the beating just kept going and going and GOING! Finally after the dude collapses- some lady checks to see if he’s ok— which he is certainly NOT! She grabs him by the collar, and the man is motionless! I shit you not this mother-fucker got murdered and they filmed it! Top notch GHETTO FIGHT!
GHETTO FIGHTS 3 seems to NEVER end. We watched well over an hour before waffling into boredom. I can say I was definitely satisfied and disappointed in myself for taking pleasure in others pain. At least Ghetto Fights is real beef- Queen of the Hood 2 seemed more depressing since it was hobo dykes getting paid to mortify themselves. You could sense they were basically fist fighting for food. Ghetto Fights just documents the hard streets!
But what got me even more excited than both of these films was the trailer at the end of Ghetto Fights 3 for:
HOOD LIFE: 2
This shit looks absolutely unparalleled!!! It’s gang-bangers recording their criminal activity! GENIUS! Just a bunch of ignorant ass mofos toting automatic rifles, gold teeth and drugs. The trailer looked sensational! These assholes straight up videotape selling crack, drive-by shootings, and the likes. LOOKS AWESOME! Here are some screen shots from HOOD LIFE 2
Stay tuned for future T$F DVD reviews!!